Category Archives: Relationships

Looking Back

The other day as my husband and I were out shopping, I ran into one of my first college professors. It’s been a long time, and I didn’t even recognize her at first. In fact, I was so flabbergasted when she stopped me and asked how I was that I wasn’t even sure how to respond.

It shouldn’t really feel like meeting a celebrity when you run into someone you already know, should it? But it really did. I was taking her classes at a time in my life when I felt ready to conquer the world. Sure, not everything was perfect, but going to a college where I knew absolutely no one was the beginning of a new era for me. I had nothing but respect and even a little awe for this woman.

Would you like to know what the best part was? (Well, I’m going to tell you anyway.) She seemed so genuinely happy for me when I told her I’m writing full time. I hear you, you’re saying that really isn’t that remarkable. But this wasn’t just your typical, “Oh, that’s great. Good for you.” This was more of a hand to her heart, wide eyes, “Oh, that’s wonderful.” Like she really knew what this meant for me. I didn’t even realize that she had understood me that well all those years ago. I was a biology major, after all. I never sat down and discussed my hopes and goals for the future with her, and at that time writing wasn’t really one of them. I had chalked it up as a pipe dream. But somehow, all these years later, she instantly knew that this was big for me.

Sometimes it’s hard to know when you’ve really been able to reach out and touch the stars. Meeting one goal often just leads to an entirely new goal. It’s good to keep going, to not be complacent, and I know that I still have so many more things I can do. But it’s also really great to look back at all the stars beneath you and to remember the people who helped you get there.


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Filed under On Writing, Relationships

For The Singles on Valentine’s Day

Well, it’s Valentine’s Day, time for all the single people to fill up Facebook with complaints about how single they are, how unfair it is, and when will it be their turn anyway??  If this sounds like something you just typed up in your status box, then I’m talking to you.

I understand how you feel.  It’s difficult to be solo on a daily basis anyway, and a holiday that specifically points it out is that much harder to deal with.  The lady at the cubicle next to you just got a big vase of red roses.  That guy you know from the gym has been bragging about the amazing date he has planned for his girlfriend.  Heart-shaped boxes of chocolate are literally everywhere, and instead of saying “Russell Stover” or “Whitman’s” on the front, they might as well say “Nanny nanny boo boo.”

But do you really think it’s going to help to whine about it?  Do you think that Mr. or Mrs. Right is going to see that sad-sack status and say, “Hey!  That’s who I’ve been looking for!”?

Yes, I am in a steady and wonderful relationship, but that is not why I’m talking to you right now.  I’m writing this because I have had PLENTY of Valentine’s Days/birthdays/Christmases/Saturday nights that I spent very much single.  There were PLENTY of times that it made me feel sad, or even made me think that I would just grow old and be a crazy cat lady for the rest of my life.  I have had some extremely lonely times in my life.

I’m writing to tell you to take this Valentine’s Day to love yourself.

Buy yourself that heart-shaped box of chocolates.  Take yourself out on a date.  Buy a bouquet of flowers to decorate your dining table.  Do what I used to do, and buy yourself a new book on a special day.  Heck, do all these things even if you’re in a relationship!  You’re worth it!

Don’t spend a random weekend in February moping and pining, and thinking that the negativity you’re pulsing out into the universe will boomerang back to you with an attractive date in tow.  Show yourself a little love.  I don’t care how cliché you think it sounds, it’s true:  You make your own happiness.



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Filed under Relationships

Strangers at the Drive Thru

A couple weeks ago I went through the Taco Bell drive thru. I pulled forward to the window (as instructed). The guy opened said window, gave me my total, and then said, “Oh, hey! How are you?”
Um.  I guess this is the part where my lying/customer service skills come in, because with very little hesitation I replied, “Oh, I’m great! How about you?”
He tried to make further small talk, but fortunately the food was ready because I do not for the life of me know who this guy was. I’d love to think that he recognized me because, as my daughter puts it, I’m a ‘famous writer’, but I have a suspicion it wasn’t.
Fast forward a couple weeks to today, when I went through McDonald’s for a soda. Quoting the Taco Bell guy, I said, “Oh, hey! How are you?” to the girl at the window.
Here’s where there’s a twist.  She told me that I looked familiar but she couldn’t quite place me, and could I tell her how we know each other?
Why couldn’t I have said that at Taco Bell? I could have solved the mystery right then and there! I am still wondering how that guy knows me, or if maybe he was mistaking me for someone else, but since I’m spineless I never will. Oh, sure I could go back through that same Taco Bell a few times and hope to see him again, but again since I’m spineless (and because it seems creepy) that will probably never happen.


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Filed under Food, Relationships

The Last Good Guy on Earth: The Extinction of a Great Species

According to several people I know (and no small amount of Facebook statuses), there are no good men left.  Not a single one.  I find this interesting, because I have a good guy.  So does that mean I got the very last one?  I cleaned out the proverbial Man Store?  Fished the last fish out of the sea?  I find that pretty hard to believe, but if social media says so than who am I to say otherwise?


Photo courtesy of artur84,


Filed under Holidays, Relationships